I had a powerful client session recently that I think highlights my unique expression in what I do. Yes, I am an astrologer, but not in the traditional sense. I can look at transits and make predictions, but my real gift is working with clients energetically to transmute or transition old energies and co-create healing while using the astrology chart as a point of reference.
Those who have been following my Facebook page and this site for a while know that my medium and intuitive skills have been opening up over the last year — specifically over the last few months as I’ve connected with my own soul fragments and transitioned them to the light. No one is teaching me how to do this; I’ve had to figure it out on my own. (Although I probably have lots of help on the other side!) But yesterday was the first time I did it for a client. She was open and willing to go to that level of healing, even it challenged her, tears coming out as I pulled on deep energetic and karmic threads.
My client, a talented healer, has been struggling to manifest security and enough income to live off of. (Yes, lightworkers have to pay the bills too! ) She’s gifted, but feels deeply unsupported by Source as her talents have yet to find a wider audience, pushing her to her breaking point. I’ve worked with her before, both as an astrologer and as her client, so we have the advantage of being familiar with each other. And thankfully she was trusting enough to allow me to go to a deeper level.
My style is very conversational. By getting a client talking and in the flow, listening to the words he or she uses to, my intuition kicks in. Sometimes a client will make a statement that is practically lit up in neon; that’s my cue that we’ve struck on the deeper material. Sometimes I just know it’s past life related and a story will start to come through. I’ll often say, “It’s like you were a . . . or it’s like this happened . . .” And then the client will validate the story, sometimes by saying that they’ve been regressed and they know of that lifetime already.
When I was talking to my client yesterday, getting the lay of the land in her auric field, I affirmed that she’s a powerful healer through my own work with her and I asked her what it felt like to be fully in her power?
She said it felt arrogant.
Cue neon lights.
Okay, obviously there’s something here. I could feel the vibration of the material coming through that statement. Why does it feel arrogant? We went back and forth a little and I felt my grasp on the energy beginning to slip, like trying to hold onto a small piece of matter in a quick moving river. But we circled back near the end of our conversation when she asked if the belief that power equals arrogance was past life related?
I said yes, it definitely felt past life related. (Neon lights!) And I paused to feel if there was anything coming through that would shed light on her question. When I spoke, it came through as a channel.
“As lightworkers we’ve walked both sides of the path. We’ve walked the dark, we’ve walked the light. We’ve used our powers for good and we’ve used our powers in arrogance and for profit and for gain at the expense of others. There’s a lot of fear and guilt about using your powers fully and allowing it to go to your head. And the people that you see that you judge as arrogant, that’s the mirror [to your past life experience].”
The lifetime that presented itself through the emotion of arrogance felt masculine. It’s as if, I explained, you chose not to help people. It’s as if you were like, well, if you don’t have the money, I’m not going to heal you, which is not where you’re at right now [as a soul], obviously.”
She explained, emotional, “My entire life I felt like it was my responsibility to help people and save them, so that makes sense.”
“That ties in with the money,” I continued. “This really mixed feeling about money and how it’s tainted for you. The sense of what’s coming through is that you were really powerful and good at what you did and you were cocky. And because you were cocky you made some decisions you came to regret. Maybe you didn’t regret right away, but it slowly gnaws at you until it becomes a cancer. I get this sense of something about children and how the community turned on you because you chose not to do something, but you were like, it’s not my responsibility. So there’s this sorrow. But you don’t have to do that anymore. You need to stop flagellating yourself. Stop sacrificing and giving penance for this lifetime.”
“As you were talking, I just made another huge connection. It’s one of many lifetimes where the community turned on me, which is why I don’t feel comfortable allowing the community to support me because my experience is that they don’t.”
As we went back and forth, the spirit of the man came through clearer. I could feel him weeping. I could feel his sorrow and remorse.
“He wants your forgiveness,” I relayed to my client with a heavy sigh. “He’s saying to me that he’s just so sorry. He wants to forgiveness . . . . ” I could feel the energy starting to quickly shift. “We need to bring him into the light . . . .”
“I’ve already taken him in. . . . I need his help.”
“He has a lot of strength to offer you. He’s not a bad guy; he made some choices that he regrets. What we’re doing is that we’re bringing him peace. We’ve all make bad choices, even as lightworkers. It’s like he’s weeping. His tears are your tears. When he’s done and integrated and crossed over, you can use his strength. It’s like he didn’t allow himself to cross over because he didn’t want to be judged. He was afraid of being judged.”
There was a pause and then I added. “How do you feel about that?”